A Good Day let offense go

A lot of things have stood out to me recently in regards to those who are offended by the happiness in one's life. If true happiness comes from living a good life than that happiness cannot "darken" another's life. The thought came to me that if only one person is making the effort and the other person won't let go of an old grudge, a made-up grudge, or withholding forgiveness, or continuing to bring up false or misperceived communications, then any type of normal healthy relationship cannot exist. Narcissistic toxic people will only find a temporary sick pleasure in harming others, in creating chaos in another's life. An example of this happened a few years ago, after my cousin committed suicide, her family instead of finding forgiveness and healing, chose (and continue to choose) to hold onto their anger and hatred. My cousin Jetta, she, no matter what others may claim, the fact is, had developed a good relationship with my family. One would think that it was a good thing, that a family rift might be on the verge of starting to heal. Unfortunately, my cousin was in over her head and decided to make some bad choices which got her in trouble with the law. In contrary belief, I do not idolize her, put her on a pedestal, or claim she is a saint in manner. There are a thousand what-ifs, what if she would not have stolen $5,000 worth of stuff from her "friend," what if she would have moved away like she wanted to, what if she wouldn't have gotten into pornography, what if she would have not had to play "keeping up with the jones," and a myriad of other things. Her family may have loved her, I do not deny that, but for them to deny that my family didn't, in fact, have a relationship with her is hypocritical. I remember when I heard the news, contrary to the lies these people told about hippa laws being broken, my family was told by a cousin. I will forever be grateful for the opportunity to go to the hospital and see her one more time, to say my goodbyes. The hospital staff, when asked said were very kind in stating that even though she might not hear us, it is very healing to come and say goodbye. Little did my family know at that time that family when asked, would deny our Grandma (I wish we would have taken her with us when we went to find out if it was really true) from seeing her Granddaughter one last time. Who does that? Who says, "oh you can go see her later..." on the phone and then totally reniggs? Only sick toxic people who only have hatred to hold onto. Any normal human being who is grieving over the loss of another, post pictures, memories, things that remind them of that person etc. But to toxic narcissistic peope, they want to control how someone is perceived and what is being said. They will also try and bring up old wounds in order to try and guilt someone from saying their piece, they will attack them any way they know how. An example of this was from my cousin who messaged me on facebook. She started out "Hey Krista, please remove all photos of Jessica from your facebook page. You do not have the right or even the slightest privelage at all to post pictures or say anything about her. Remember calling her a "slut" in public. You guys have absolutely unexplainable behavior. You have nothing to gain, no life insurance, no social security, no love from her or our family. Do not show up to ANYTHING our family is involved in. You will be escorted out." My response was " Dearest {}, My heart goes out to you. The power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ is the greatest things there is. I am so grateful Jetta and I are on good terms. We forgave one another how much I love her. Isn’t great being a part of the Gospel of Jesus Christ where Love and forgiveness are at the heart of it a wondrous thing? My time as a temple worker has taught me much.. Now I do have to address what you are saying: What use would I have for Jetta’s life insurance or her social security? Those should go to her darling {children}. May God Bless you and whatever anger or hurt you are feeling May God Bring you Peace. Love always, Krista" This person and I belong to the same religious sect, and I find solace in living my religion to the best of my ability. It is beyond baffling to me why any type of insurance would be brought up. But then I remembered my Great Uncle, these people actually did not understand why others wanted to see my Great Uncle, they believe that only they, not his personal family, should be entitled to his money. These sick toxic people have never nor will they ever understand that it was never about the money. It was almost comical that this person believes this to be the case. This person in these FB messages goes on to insult my Mum, my Dad, claiming lies she had been fed. After that, she again starts to personally attack me again, " Do not even pretend to be remotely a part of this family. You sure play the temple, doctrine like you are good." I believed at the time, that this person was acting out of anger and shock of knowing her sister hung herself and left this life by suicide and responded with that mindset. "You didn't know Jetta. She visited us and Grandma more than you know. As for us not being family We are sealed together forever by the Holy Priesthood. I feel so sorry for you. You have a lot of anger to get over." Unfortunately, this person must not have been in their right mind when they responded back, for what healthy, nontoxic person would respond in such a manner? " Hey bitch. You have zero right to say I didn't know my sister. Stop your garbage now. I will remain angry with you and your wicked family as long as you continue to stalk and harrass my family especially my parents. You are like cockroaches that crawl out of the shadows when you feel like it's an opportune moment. Jessica came around for Lenore, I promise it had nothing to do with you or mummy dearest. Let me spell this out because ya'll are so BPD (look it up), no one in my family like any of you freaks. You are not welcome at anything in which our family is involved. We'll all stand before the Lord someday and he will make the call on all this. Thank goodness he takes care of that. I'm done talking to you. Since you are so peaceful and zen, take that ultra spirituality and find some decency to leave us all alone. If you loved Jessica the way you say you do than respect her by leaving her family alone." The only thing that comes to mind, is how much I pity for this family. I cannot imagine what it must be like to live with that much hate. To take good intentions and twist it into something so hateful and claim false harassment, to take random encounters and become so disillusioned to turn them into stalking encounters. They are aware of the chaos they create around them, they consciously created drama (lying, name-calling, swearing, snide remarks, etc). The lesson I learned from this is these types of people who, have toxic mental illnesses running through there family, will do anything they can to cause offense and keep the contention going so that they do not have look truth in the eye. To say these things, they must have a toxic sickness, for how can they live a normal life when they (as stated) cling to anger. They believed, (and who knows maybe they still cling on that belief), my family only went to Jetta's funeral to torment them. It could have been a time for healing to start, but they cling to hatred. They do not understand. Instead, at the funeral, they saw spies everywhere and treated anyone whom they deemed to be one with contempt and outright rudeness... But those family members embroiled by so much hate could not understand (nor can they now) That funeral was more than just Jetta and honoring her life. For my family it was about an old woman, her Grandma, asking for pictures of the funeral so she might say goodbye on her terms. "Its realized that a death brings out emotions to the surface but it's not normal for this much anger and hatred to come up. Usually, love abounds... However, it seems that their family is enjoying bringing contention to the forefront, calling names when there is no basis...What proof do they have of the so-called tape, vandalism...and why a freak or wicked...these are figments of someone's imagination and disillusions. Because they do not exist in the way they say... Again we feel so sorry for them. They might think of getting some counseling for how shaken up they are." After having to endure these situations, I saw this quote and did some introspection, "Am I offended by them?" The answer came from the right-hand column, (I have given my offense to God) and to those who have taken offense and accused me of my using the "Jesus" card, I say, that's right, I will always use the Jesus card because he is my Savior and Salvation. I have given my life over to Him. My Door is always open to forgiveness and moving forward. Someday I will be able to say to their face that I forgive them as for now I am enjoying the Peace the Gospel of Jesus Christ affords me. I choose not to be offended.